The Skimmer

Certain types of people make me suspicious. For example: people who claim to love reading, but can’t string together a coherent written sentence.1

I wonder if they’re trying to seem more cultured or informed than they really are. If they really do “read” a lot, I suspect they’re doing it wrong. Maybe they’re skimming, without actually absorbing anything. Maybe they just ignore the words they don’t understand. Maybe they only read stream-of-consciousness absurdist poetry. There’s just something incongruous about a person who reads a lot but isn’t able to articulate thoughts into written words. I can’t help but suspect there’s a disconnect somewhere.

Most of all, I suspect they need to read more.

  1. I’m not expecting eloquent, complex, scholarly essays (and I’m not complaining about occasional typos, or not remembering whether it’s “Jimmy and me” or “Jimmy and I.”) I’m talking about basic, junior-high level sentence structure—with nouns, verbs, and adjectives in their proper places—and correctly spelling common words. []