This Is Twittering: Meta-Commentary Digest, Episode 37

Now hear this.

STUPID:

“How are you?” is an odd phrase.

REACTION:

I don’t always do this, but you’ll be happy to know that I really do sometimes do this. Usually no one else is around, which makes it rather more comical.

WORDPLAY:

This is not a joke about the Holocaust. It’s a joke about humblebragging. Possible variations include: cancer survivor, shipwreck survivor, and Destiny’s Child.

REACTION:

John Hodgman is the writer I was trying to be before I ever knew who he was. Although he has written three volumes of COMPLETE WORLD KNOWLEDGE, the first book, The Areas of My Expertise, is my favorite.

REACTION:

See, I posted this on my birthday.1

STUPID:

This doesn’t make sense. Or does it?

STUPID:

No, they aren’t.

STUPID:

Shame on you.

REACTION:

This is not a joke about alcoholism. It is a joke about entertainment media.

REACTION:

Not because their negligence is putting their family in danger, but because that incessant beeping is really annoying me.

WISDOM:

I was just kidding.

WORDPLAY:

In fact, it would be cooler if it wasn’t a thing.2 Spoken a certain way, it almost sounds like an onomatopoeia-ized drum fill. Both panic and attack are evocative rock-and-roll words. The only thing it really has going against it is that it is such a common phrase. That’s too bad.

And that’s all.

  1. Annoyingly, Twitter.com does not display hard returns properly (which is another reason to use a superior Twitter client like Tweetbot). []
  2. Of course there are bands named Panic Attack, but that’s neither here nor there. []