This Is Twittering: Meta-Commentary Digest, Episode 39

It’s time for another episode of This Is Twittering: Meta-Commentary Digest. I know I’ve been doing a lot of these, but I have to clear out the backlog. Quit complaining. It’s free.

STUPID:

This is not strictly true.

REACTION:

If you’re on Twitter, please follow me. Tell your friends to follow me. I have terribly low self-esteem.

STUPID:

This is funny because it’s true. Not literally true, of course, but true nonetheless. Especially if it’s hot out.

STUPID:

Several years ago, around the time I first joined Twitter, I tooted basically the same joke. Back then I had a real job and I probably said something about my coworkers giving me funny looks for wearing a spacesuit. I think it’s a funny joke, so I recycled it. Just like astronauts recycle their urine. Just kidding, I don’t know if they really do that. I’ve been doing a lot of toilet humor lately. Probably because it’s hilarious.

REACTION:

I got health insurance.

WISDOM:

OK, I didn’t get it just so I could make that joke. But I did have the joke saved for many months before I could afford insurance.

WISDOM:

It’s uncanny.

WORDPLAY:

This is part of my “The Best Things In Life Are Things That Start With The Syllable ‘Free'” series. Past and future items include freezers, freesias, and:

The ol’ switcheroo.

REACTION:

This is based on people I know who are annoyed when other people tell them not to complain about their job because they should just be thankful they have a job. I’m sure the people telling them to be thankful are trying to be nice, but it’s an insultingly dismissive thing to say.

Also, telling someone to be thankful they have a head is very funny.

REACTION:

See, because of high gas prices and the nature of internal combustion engines.

WISDOM:

This is funny and profound.

REACTION:

Within the period of a couple months, the ABC network began airing GCB and Don’t Trust the B**** in Apartment 23.

WORDPLAY:

See, because of “everything” bagels.

STUPID:

This is just me being absurd, and I think it’s great. You should retweet this one.

That concludes this episode of This Is Twittering: Meta-Commentary Digest.