This Is Twittering: Meta-Commentary Digest, Episode 66

Sometimes I tell jokes on Twitter and then I freak out and wonder if anybody understood the joke I was trying to make because, holy crap, what if I’m not as hilarious as I think I am!? So then I post them again here and explain them so they make even less sense, and This Is Twittering: Meta-Commentary Digest.

WISDOM:

And I really like defining terms.

REACTION:

Since this tweet, I’ve actually spoken to him a few times, rather than just nodding. He’s a friendly guy.

WISDOM:

There’s no such device as an automated carpet pooper. Yet.

WISDOM:

Obviously I mean in the era of ubiquitous visual media, so don’t even bother with the Lincoln example. I kind of want Chris Christie to be president because having a fat president again would be cool too.

STUPID:

This is a joke about expectations and unoriginal jokes. Then again, isn’t everything?

STUPID:

This is very dumb and I like it very much.

STUPID:

I’m not sure if this was meant to be actual commentary or just dumb. Either way, I like it. I like (1) describing anything as “hipster”, because it’s such a nebulous concept, and (2) the idea that ibuprofen is a trendier version of acetaminophen.

REACTION:

This is a joke about cars getting really hot in the summer and metal being a conductor of heat and my nail clippers get really hot and ouch!

REACTION:

It’s true. How badass is that? First you’ve got “World War”. World War? That sounds like a pretty damn serious war! But then wait — oh, no big deal, because this one is World War TWO! That’s right, it’s the second one! And you know what, let’s just put the cherry on top of this sundae of awesomeness (and devastation) and make it a Roman numeral. Are you frickin’ kidding me?! So bitchin’. Happy belated Veterans Day (observed)!

STUPID:

My dad never told me I was a screwup, but this is a funny joke.

That concludes this episode of This Is Twittering: Meta-Commentary Digest.