Internets

11.28.08

This is Twittering: Meta-commentary Digest, Episode 2 Internets | (3)
Time for more. REACTION: The use of skulls as a design element seems pretty tired. Unless you're a designer of skeletons. You know what I'm saying? Skulls are supposed to be all badass, then a few years ago they started trying to make them cute (I assume to take advantage of the untapped female bone-loving demographic). It's just dumb. I don't want to see any more skulls. Not on belt buckles. Not with little pink bows on. Not behind your face. El día de los STUPID, am I right? STUPID: I’m pregnant with your child. OK, OK, I’m exaggerating. I’m pregnant with your fetus. This is ...
11.23.08

This is Twittering: Meta-commentary Digest, Episode 1 Internets | (2)
I realize that not everyone is cool enough to use Twitter, and the little box on the right isn't enough to stay up to date on my scathingly brilliant wit and warptitude. With this in mind, I am going to collect the best of the worst of my twitterings here, in a new segment I like to call "This is Twittering: Meta-commentary Digest". It also gives me a chance to commentate on my commentary, in chronological order (which I love, obviously). Everything listed is original content, by me, unless it's in quotes; then it is me quoting something. Categories include: ...
10.01.08

You: I love you. Also, possibly, hate. Internets | (10)
Attention faithful viewers: Next week is Official Commenter Appreciation Week! Every year, the first full week of October is reserved for blog-type people to appreciate their commenters. (It should be noted that there may actually be such a thing, but for my purposes I am making this up right now as I type.) All over the intertubes, famous person-bloggers take a week to shower love and non-sexual favors on their loving, non-sexually favorable readers. I, being the bastion of magnanimity that I am, of course, am no exception. All next week I will be publishing odes and homages to my ...
09.24.08

New Page, or How I learned to stop worrying and love the permalink Internets | (0)
Because you demoted it, I've created a new page (see top) containing all of my wittilicious blog taglines, in reverse chronomagical order. Out of context like that, they're pretty lame (i.e., cow), so I may take it down. That means you better click it while it's hot. Sushi.
09.17.08

Stop the character assassination Internets | (2)
Over the last few days there's been a lot of internet gossip about me—mostly on Gawker, and then Drudge picked it up. People are saying mean, hateful things. They're saying that I don't really have business cards like I posted a few days ago. One commenter on Politico even claimed that I don't have any fingers. Well, to put these rumors to rest, and to restore my and my fingers' good names*, I've produced (annotated) photographic proof: Now I think we can put this sad episode behind us once and for all. I am currently much too busy (in life), doing ...

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